Tuesday, May 25

What Part Of...

Fill in the blank.

So I've mentioned that utterance before, in the form of "What part of merge don't you understand?" I shan't go into the vagaries of driving in California, since that isn't the issue here. It's the "fill in the blank" part.

This time it's "What part of 'I don't have a card' don't you understand?"

Says the helpful checker: "Do you have your 'Club Card'"?

Says I: "I don't have a card."

Long-winded conversations with checkers, particularly ones I'll never see again, are things I avoid like the plague. Just got back from a little trip to the nearby Safeway market to get some munchies, since when you're otherwise cooped up in a hotel room with nothing else better to do - there is free HBO, however - one starts dreaming of all the bad food you otherwise would not be eating at home, or can't get away with, not to mention having to share.

Wandering down the aisles, I begin to realize that most of the products on the shelves do in fact have a reduced price if you have the aforementioned "Club Card".

I assume this means like Sam's Club or Costco. Membership cards, in other words. Except that Costco and Sam's sells product in mega-packs of everything, and all I'm getting are some granola bars. Yeah, that's gonna save a bundle.

Last year on my trip to Chicago, there was a Mom 'n' Pop market near the hotel; I ended up getting a card for there because the sweet, sweet, checker just would not shut up about the damn card, and could not believe I "still" hadn't gotten a Dominick's card.

"What, don't you want to save some moneeee?"

So you can imagine my consternation when asked for a "Club Card".

After telling me I could just type in my phone number, and not wanting to get into the whole "I am not from California and there are no Safeway's in Utah" two-step, I said simply:


With that, thankfully, she did not pursue the issue.

Oh, and I still have that damn Dominick's card.

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